Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Of Haircuts and the like.

I’m a man. Yes, I am. If you ignore my effeminate features and take my word for it, that is. Apart from being the stupider of the two (should I say three to be politically correct? Okay, 4, the 4th gender is for politicians- they’re neither of the three, but a cross between pond scum and cigarette ash) genders, I am also a non- metro sexual male. I’d like to be one, yes. But I've never enjoyed facials, massages- unless it was.. let’s not go there, shopping, or haircuts.

Hair Saloons have never been the place I spend a lot of time in. My Barber- a friend since childhood- is quick at his job and while we might talk about everything under God’s umbrella while he goes snippety snip, other than that, we don’t communicate a lot.

I've also never thought of spending more than 50 INR on hair trimming, and that’s the cost of getting a haircut NOW. So when my wife suggested I visit a hair stylist whose branded shops have sprung up faster than my hair grows, I was aghast! My sis in law was vociferously nodding in agreement. The only thought that was going through my head was; how could I spend about 2000 on getting my hair cut?!
One of my 'killer' haircuts.

Since childhood, I reckon I must have had about 300 odd haircuts with an average price of say, 20 bucks. That’s 6000. Was I going to spend a 1/3rd of my lifetime hair cutting expense in one seating?! Why?!

The Haircut that got me my soulmate

Why, I asked her. She said that they would style my hair in a manner which’d be the embodiment of successful, stylish and sexy, the three ‘S’s’. They’d style it, condition it, gel it. They’d take a photo of my mug and show me different styles which would suit my face. No, the cost didn’t cover plastic surgery, so I knew the attempt to doll me up would be futile.

The haircut that got me the job.

Also, in my defense, I do have a decent job, had about 10 women who swooned over me- no, not at the same time- and I got married to my soul mate, right? I did all of that without a swanky haircut, thank you. I hadn’t folded under the pressure during my marriage, and I wasn’t going to do so now.

I didn’t. I gifted my women a few gift vouchers of one of those swanky, financial black holes called Spas, and told them that one should do what one enjoys. If they liked a bit of pampering, that was extremely cool, I didn’t. And they got it.

I’m back to my old Barber, but I do get a facial every quarter now. Kind of an agreement with the women. I have promised her that I will visit them swanky saloons sometime soon, when I have the heart for it.

Does any non- metro sexual male out there have a story to tell?


Andrea Rajani said...

Excellent take!!

Anonymous said...

이미 방송됐던 드라마임에도 우리카지노가입 불구하고 예스카지노 가 각종 포털사이트 검색어 1위에 ‘반지의 여왕’이 오르며 뜨거운 관심을 받고 있다. 피를 흘리며 쓰러져 있는 박복자와 그 옆에 서 있는 미세스조(서경화 분), 이를 발견하고 큐카지노 가 도망친 안재희(오나라 분)도 서로를 지목했다. 조건만 보고 이상한 사이트 쓰다가 먹튀당하지말고 보증된 제왕써라 형은 산전수전 다 겪었다.