I’m a man. Yes, I am. If you ignore my effeminate features
and take my word for it, that is. Apart from being the stupider of the two (should
I say three to be politically correct? Okay, 4, the 4th gender is
for politicians- they’re neither of the three, but a cross between pond scum
and cigarette ash) genders, I am also a non- metro sexual male. I’d like to be
one, yes. But I've never enjoyed facials, massages- unless it was.. let’s not
go there, shopping, or haircuts.
Hair Saloons have never been the place I spend a lot of time
in. My Barber- a friend since childhood- is quick at his job and while we might
talk about everything under God’s umbrella while he goes snippety snip, other
than that, we don’t communicate a lot.
I've also never thought of spending more than 50 INR on hair
trimming, and that’s the cost of getting a haircut NOW. So when my wife
suggested I visit a hair stylist whose branded shops have sprung up faster than
my hair grows, I was aghast! My sis in law was vociferously nodding in
agreement. The only thought that was going through my head was; how could I
spend about 2000 on getting my hair cut?!
 |
| One of my 'killer' haircuts. |
Since childhood, I reckon I must have had about 300 odd
haircuts with an average price of say, 20 bucks. That’s 6000. Was I going to
spend a 1/3rd of my lifetime hair cutting expense in one seating?!
Why?!
 |
| The Haircut that got me my soulmate |
Why, I asked her. She said that they would style my hair in
a manner which’d be the embodiment of successful, stylish and sexy, the three ‘S’s’.
They’d style it, condition it, gel it. They’d take a photo of my mug and show
me different styles which would suit my face. No, the cost didn’t cover plastic
surgery, so I knew the attempt to doll me up would be futile.
 |
| The haircut that got me the job. |
Also, in my defense, I do have a decent job, had about 10
women who swooned over me- no, not at the same time- and I got married to my soul
mate, right? I did all of that without a swanky haircut, thank you. I hadn’t
folded under the pressure during my marriage, and I wasn’t going to do so now.
I didn’t. I gifted my women a few gift vouchers of one of
those swanky, financial black holes called Spas, and told them that one should
do what one enjoys. If they liked a bit of pampering, that was extremely cool,
I didn’t. And they got it.
I’m back to my old Barber, but I do get a facial every
quarter now. Kind of an agreement with the women. I have promised her that I
will visit them swanky saloons sometime soon, when I have the heart for it.
Does any non- metro sexual male out there have a story to
tell?
